


My Journey To See You In A Minute

by christy_ao3



Category: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: F/M, Fix-It, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), romanogers - Freeform, stevenat - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-10
Updated: 2020-01-20
Packaged: 2021-02-26 02:55:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,077
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21746362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/christy_ao3/pseuds/christy_ao3
Summary: One shot. Steve’s POV.Steve’s journey before meeting Natasha again.Steve knew Natasha won’t be there even if he returns to the future so he went back in the past with hopes of changing it, but will he be able to change what was already destined to happen?
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Natasha Romanov
Kudos: 35





	1. My Journey To See You In A Minute

_"See you in a minute."_

But you didn't came.

I went to return the stones, but you weren't there.

_"A soul for a soul."_

But I didn't get an exchange when I returned the stone.

See you in a minute.

No, I know you won't be there.

So I went back to my original time.

I met Peggy. My best girl. We danced, we kissed. It was perfect...

No.

It would've been perfect. But I'm not that Steve anymore.

Time change, so did I. I grew, I lived a life... I moved on. I don't belong here anymore.

I belong somewhere else, in the future. I belong to someone else.

Natasha.

See you in a minute.

I might take long, but I'll see you in a minute. Meet me in a minute.

I spent my days in the past, I did what I think I should. I saved Bucky, I saved Natasha, I saved Howard and his wife. I thought at least in this universe they'll have a different fate.

I thought...

But no. I only made it worse.

Natasha was captured again. So I decided to get rid of the red room, but every time I do, they'll rebuild stronger. They'll always get a hold of Natasha, they'll torture her even more. So I stopped, it hurts but I had to.

Bucky, he disappeared once again. Then I found out Hydra got a hold of him, it goes the same with Natasha every time I tried to save him.

Howard, he was still killed. It wasn't Bucky but one of the Winter Soldier experiments.

I'm making things worse for them. So I turned a blind eye. It was hard but maybe it's supposed to be that way. Those hardships, tortures, they made them who they are in the future. A hero. A selfless person who are willing to trade their lives to save others.

Their past is part of them, and that's what made them stronger. Finding the good in them despite being taught differently, brainwashed most of their lives.

I was there when Clint made a different call. I was there when Bucky find his way out of Hydra.

I aged. I lived a life, going incognito saving lives. I lived a life, a simple one.

2012.

_"Yeah, it's gonna be fun."_

That exact moment, I knew I could trust you.

You're brave.

You're smart.

You're strong.

You're a hero.

2014.

There we are. Fitting in the crowd, getting location.

_"Yeah, we're getting married."_

But in 9 years later we still haven't.

I'm seeing our kiss in that escalator, funny how I can still feel your lips in mine. I guess, I don't want to forget how it felt the first time your lips met mine.

_"You're still uncomfortable?"_

_"That's not exactly the word I would use."_

I was taken aback... I froze but I felt warm.

There are plenty of words to describe it but never uncomfortable.

Now we're escaping and I know what will happen next, but I'm not worried one bit, I know this Steve will protect you. I'm at a distance, I can only see you're back now and it's slowly fading in my sight. See you in a minute, Nat.

I turned right. I'm at a jewelry store now. I'm here to buy you a ring, us. The attendant assumed it's for my 50th Wedding Anniversary, I just laughed. I never thought of this until now. I was supposed to say, 'Marry me in a minute Nat', but will it still be possible?

I would've loved to grow old with you, but I grew old alone with only memories of you.

It hurts but nothing hurts more than the moment you never came back.

I'm in Sokovia now, I think it was a bad idea. You almost got me. I guess, in whatever form I am, in whatever disguise or how old I am, you'd still know it's me.

Evacuation is almost done. I got that kid Clint was supposed to save, already safe in the Helicarrier. For a second I prayed this is gonna work out.

For a moment everything else went silent but the sound of bullets piercing to someones body, one, two, three, I lost count. I turned to see who it is, though I know who it'll be. Everything went slow, Pietro. I knew I couldn't change ones fate. There he is, Pietro taking bullets to save a mother with his kid. Clint took his body to the Helicarrier, I can see him say something to Clint for the last time, 'I saw that coming.'.

Everyone can feel Wanda's range, then I can see Bruce gently putting you down in the same Helicarrier I'm in, he saved you.

Hulk flew the quinjet to who knows where. I can see how devastated you were. If it was back then I would've mistaken it for love, but after knowing you more each day I'd say it's more of care for a teammate. And I'm not saying that because of jealousy, now I know there's no reason to.

2016.

The fallout. After nearly caught by you, I made sure to keep enough distance. When the Accords happen, I was open to everyone's opinion, wether we share one or not. Yet, I was still hoping we had the same one. It did hurt a little when you agreed with Tony, but I understood.

Then I got informed about Peggy. You know Sam was with me, but you still came. You knew when I needed you the most and you'll always come, wherever it may be and whatever situation there is. And I hope you knew I'd do the same for you.

I know what was gonna happen, I remember how incomplete it felt when you weren't on my team. But I understand you as much as you did to me.

I'm around the area this time when the explosion happened. I still remember how worried I was, but now, seeing you safe and helping people like you always do, it makes me feel a lot relieved. That time I came here, it wasn't only for Bucky but to check on you too, I understand better now.

I'm at a distance and I can see my young self waiting for you to pick up your phone. Seven missed calls, before you finally picked up. Can't blame myself, I was dumb to realize it then but I know I already cared for you deeper than how friends does.

The young me had to go on my mission to save Bucky, I know he'll do well and I don't have anything to help. So I'm here to stay with you, never felt so good to have two selves at once.

At this time, I'm probably under a bridge kissing Sharon. For once I'm glad we're not on the same team, you could've witnessed that. Young me doesn't know yet, but I know, you were already into me longer than that. You would've been silently hurting and I don't want to see that.

I told you how Sharon called night after, telling me she kissed me to get the answer to her question. Turns out she already knew I was into you before I even realize it myself. And I'm glad she didn't tell me what question she had. I'm thankful she let me realize it myself, because I don't want to make you feel that I only love you because someone told me so.

Few weeks on the run before you'll show up in front of my door. In those weeks I came to realize how special you are to me. Seconds felt minutes, minutes felt hours that's how it was without you by my side, and that's how I feel now that I can only see you from afar, cant even speak to you.

Two years on the run. If I had known, I would've asked you to marry me already.

Two years, it drag on for too long. I feel useless, just waiting for the snap to happen, to witness people turn to dust once again. I cannot even do anything, not my will nor my strength.

Loki.

Heimdal.

Vision.

Snap.

Dusted.

Accidents.

Five years before everything goes back to how it is supposed to be. Five years til Natasha sacrifices herself. Five years left for Natasha to live, but she wont even live her life. Five years left for Tony to spend time with his family.

I'll do what I can, volunteer whenever I can.

The five years will be hard on you, on us. But it's harder now that I know I've wasted that much time waiting for you to be ready. I should've done better, making you see the vision I have for both you and me. As selfish as it is, I should've convinced you better that it's okay... it's okay to live our lives.

It hurts knowing I can't do anything to change someone's fate, not in the original timeline and not in this one.

2023.

For the first time in so long, I can let myself be near everyone.

I'm sitting on the bench near the lake, I can hear someone approaching me. It's Sam.

**"Do you want to tell me about her?"**

**"No. I don't think I will."**

I don't think I will, not because I don't want to but because I don't have anything to tell.

I wore the ring I bought back in 2014. The ring I'd like to give Natasha when the minute comes but I probably won't be able to give. I guess it's safe to say, I married the Natasha in my memories. It sounds crazy but who wouldn't, I lived two timelines but neither gave me the happy ending that I deserve. With the love of my life, with Natasha. Not that I expected to get it when I went back in time.

I'll see you soon.

...

**"You're late."**

That voice. How I missed it.

**"Nat."**

She didn't even look to know it was me. Still the Natasha I know, the Natasha I love, the one I will always love. The love of my life.

She's waiting, looking over the horizon.

I stepped closer, standing beside her. Now she's right by my side, like she always have. We are exactly where we're supposed to be, where we'd like to be, right next to each other.

**"Where else could we get a view like this."**

I turned to look at her. She still got the same expression she had way back, at peace. And I found mine soon my eyes landed on her, back then and now.

**"Beautiful."** , She is. Always. Then and now.

She turns to look at me, her smile looks even more beautiful.

It took me long but I'm here, meeting you after a minute.


	2. I'll See You In A Minute, Steve

Whatever it takes...

I'll see you in a minute...

  
...

I jumped off that cliff.

One.

Two.

Three.

My body fell fast but it felt slow. Like how a minute felt slow, waiting, to see you again.

I don’t know how long it has been but you’re there at the top of the cliff. Weird how I can see you clearly. I can hear you clearly from where I landed, at the bottom of where you’re standing.

You’re close, yet you’re far. You’re far, yet so close. I can’t touch you, and it hurts.

_**‘Did it hurt?’** _

No it didn’t, didn’t feel anything.

_**‘We’re you scared?’** _

Oh Steve, don’t do this to yourself. It hurts seeing you this way. I want to wipe your tears away, but I cant. I want to hold you but there’s no way to reach you.

I can see your back retreating.

I’m here Steve.

I see you’re taking a detour, I’m here but go on. I know you’re lost and I’m sorry I couldn’t guide you, but I believe you’ll find your way back. I’d still see you in a minute.

Go. Only if you’ll go will I see you again.

2012.

I first met you. It wasn’t anything special but it doesn’t take long to like you, as a person.

2014.

We became partners and I kept setting you up on dates. Dates that I know you wouldn’t take.

Not until Sharon.

Remember when you saved me? I thought there’s no way out but you made one for us. Just when I thought I couldn’t trust anyone, you made me trust you.

I had so much in my mind. I was lost in my thought, and you came to me. I was reminded how you saved my life, then I wonder, will you trust me with yours? When I thought no one would trust me, you did.

Reminds me of that conversation.

_‘What do you want me to be?’_

_‘How bout a friend?’_

I expected something less. I can see it in your eyes, you meant it. I looked at you a little longer trying to see any hesitation but none. You really mean it. Can we really be friends? Am I worthy of that? I thought.

Looking back at it, I can say, I am. I’m more than just my title now, I’m a human. I’m Natasha.

Sokovia. I can still remember how we stood side by side, ready to take the fall.

_‘Where else are we gonna get a view like this?’_

If you’re here beside me now, you’ll see a lot more beautiful view. No. There’s no view better than the one shared with you. It’s the view that makes a moment beautiful but its who you are with that makes it perfect.

See me in a minute, Steve.

2016.

The fallout. The most painful thing before Thanos happened. I never thought a day would come I’d wish it’s the worse thing that happened. It was hard but a lot better than Thanos, at least I could’ve seen everyone safe and alive.

Now, Tony’s here, with me. He always asks if I miss him, but look who actually misses who. He really had to follow me up here, not even a minute after.

I wish he didn’t, because he has his family.

I wish I didn’t, because I have a family.

I wish no one had to, because we are a family.

I waited for you outside the church. Everyone’s out but you. I went in and saw you from the entrance, slowly I walked towards you. Was I wrong to hope the next time I walked the isle is with you waiting at the altar? It doesn’t even matter now.

_‘We have what we have when we have it.’_

And now I don’t have you.

_‘I don’t want you to be alone.’_

I didn’t, and still don’t. But I’m not there to make you feel your not, yet I’m not worried. I know the boys will do their job.

And I know. I’m going to see you in a minute, because you wouldn’t want me to be alone. But take your time, because I’m not alone.

I saw how the fight got worse, and I was scared. For the first time I knew what I didn’t want to lose. You, and everyone else. Fighting each other is one of the worse view I’ve ever seen. I can’t stand there and wait for someone to get badly injured and then there, Rhodey fell.

I knew I did right to let you go. It could’ve been worse and we would’ve never forgiven each other. I can’t live, I can’t leave like that.

The run. Guess this was when I finally admitted to myself how differently I feel for you. Few weeks and you look so restless. Was it that hard being away from me, Rogers. Flatters me.

Few weeks more before you finally admitted your feelings for me. I guess I set you up with Sharon for this reason. What’s meant to be will always be, indeed.

Two years, then all the good times came to an end.

Thanos.

The fallen Avengers.

The loss of Family.

My life.

Us.

I lost everything in that snap, even myself.

When Carol came, I thought we could have had a chance. Yet we didn’t.

I felt like I failed everyone.

Wanda.

Sam.

Nick.

Maria.

Laura and the kids.

Vision.

Five years later, we got the chance we deserved.

_‘See you in a minute.’,_ I said.

And I’m sorry it’s more than a minute now and I still haven’t found my way back. Maybe because this is where I’m meant to be. Then find me. Let’s see each other in a minute.

We won. Yet I still kept failing everyone.

I was sorry to Clint for leaving him with a guilt. There was no other way.

I was sorry for everyone, I left without saying goodbye.

I was sorry, to you, for taking all the time to be ready.

I was sorry for myself for depriving me of the life I could’ve lived while I could.

I was. Now, I understand. Not everyone who leaves will be able to put things on its place, but that doesn’t mean it won’t. In time, it will on it’s own.

Clint will learn to let go of the guilt he should never have.

I never left my family. I’ll always be in their hearts, like how they all will in mine.

You. You always understood. And you’ll find your way to me, whatever worlds we may be.

And I. I lived a life. However I spent it, it’s still a life nonetheless. And here, I’ll continue to live a life. The way I wasn’t able to. And when the time comes, I’ll be there when you’re ready to join me.

Take your time.

Because I know I’ll be seeing you in a minute.

...

**‘You’re late.’.** You’re here.

**‘Nat.’**

How I miss that voice.

I can hear his steps getting closer. Now, he’s right by my side. We are exactly where we’re supposed to be, where we’d like to be, right next to each other.

**‘Where else could we get a view like this.’**

I can feel him relaxing. At peace. The same way it did back then.

**‘Beautiful.’**

You are. Always. Then and now.

I turn to look at him, his smile looks even more beautiful. He looks the same as he did the last time I saw him, even better. No more pains, worries, guilt, regrets. Just Steve in his best self.

You’re here, meeting me after a minute.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's confusing. Actually it's Natasha after the jump, recalling the days he met Steve, just like how Steve traveled back in time, experiencing the same events over again.


End file.
